grace, for giving

So, it's funny that as I'm reading this book (Traveling Mercies by Anne Lamott), I haven't been expecting much. But as I keep trucking along, various statements are striking through me like lightning bolts.

These reflections from a chapter on forgiveness hit me like cold water in the face...

In fact, not forgiving is like drinking rat poison and then waiting for the rat to die.

The clipping said that forgiveness meant that God is for giving,  and that we are for giving too, and that to withhold love or blessings is to be completely delusional.

Man...the imagery of the rat poison comment alone was enough to stop me in my tracks. I mean, I've been that person...expecting someone else to suffer because of anger/resentment/hurt I've held on to...only to realize that it's only me who's suffering from my own bitterness. Which made me even more thankful for the reminder of grace...

[Grace is] unearned love - love that goes before, that greets us on the way. It's help you receive when you have no bright ideas left, when you are empty and desperate and have discovered that your best thinking and most charming charm have failed you.

It's not a long book....in fact, I've devoured much lengthier reads than this in much less time...but this is one I'm having to take a little slower (mainly because it keeps taking swipes at my precarious walls). Honestly I do have some issues with the book, but there are occasional redeeming kernels of truth that make me stop, think and pray....and those moments just break me a little more (in a good way).

On a sidenote...let me just say: I love God's timing...seriously, He's got great timing. I say that because a couple of friends recommended this book to me several years ago...and it wasn't until two years ago that I actually purchased a copy. I obviously put off reading it until now...but this is when I needed to hear these messages the most.