Big Dreamin'

I tend to have extremely random and peculiar dreams. One time I dreamed that I was a man…and not just any man, I was like a mix between James Bond and Batman. I don’t know what that reveals about my psyche…because I haven’t talked to anyone else that has ever had a dream where they were a person of the opposite gender…but it does make for fairly interesting conversation.

On Friday, I had a dream that I was performing in a high school talent show. Sounds normal enough, right? Um, no…this wasn’t just any high school…apparently, I was at Hip Hop HS…the class president was Sean Combs (aka. Diddy, P.Diddy, Puff Daddy, whatever alias he chooses to make up, etc), and my talent show partner was the high school basketball star, Shawn Carter (aka. Jay-Z). But it wasn’t all rap superstars… several of my friends were randomly scattered throughout the dream. It is interesting to note that all of us still had our full-time jobs, but yet we were still in high school.

Throughout the whole dream, I was in a frenzy to find Shawn (which is how I referred to him instead of calling him Jay-Z…but I guess we were just that tight [in my dream]) since we hadn’t really prepared well for our performance. I became increasingly nervous after watching several talent show performances that involved circus clowns, flame-throwers, the Ying Yang twins and acrobats. My anxiety was even more amplified by the fact that Diddy kept harassing me about whether or not my partner and I were ready to perform, so I had to keep stalling for more time.

I decided to take action and actively search for my missing partner. My friend, Jacey jumped in to help me comb the school to find the ever-elusive Jay-Z. As we rushed through the hallways, the school began to take on the appearance of a luxury resort. I finally found Jay-Z making out with a girl (who I distinctly remember noting was not Beyonce) in a private pool area. And here’s how the rest of the dream played out:

ME: Shawn, you have to get ready…we have to do our talent show performance now, or we’re going to fail.

(He barely turns to acknowledge our presence.)

JAY-Z: Nah’….we’re not down for this show (motions like he’s waving me off).

ME: What do you mean…are you saying that you’re not doing this? In order to pass, we have to do this show.

JAY-Z: No…I don’t need this, because I’m on a basketball scholarship (still trying to figure out the logic on this one)...and I don’t do things 2nd rate...

ME: But you’re a singer….I mean, this is what you do! ( I throw my arms up in frustration). Can’t you just get up there and sing...and I’ll just dance around in the background and randomly throw out some background vocals?

JAY-Z: That’s not how I operate. Look, it doesn’t bother me, 'cause it doesn’t affect my job. Sorry if this gets you fired. (obviously not only my grades were dependent on this one performance, but so was my job)

JACEY: Surely, this won’t affect her job review at the UIL (which it interesting to note that I have my actual review coming up this Friday)…she’s worked there for several years, so I doubt they would fire her over this.

(Jacey and I walk away; I’m completely exasperated by the fact that Jay-Z refuses to perform with me in the mandatory talent show.)

ME: I don’t know what to do. Should I go on stage by myself, and just do what I can?

JACEY: No, you’ll be fine…Adam had to miss his performance as well, because he had to go back to the capitol for a meeting. I really think you’ll be ok.

I couldn’t help but wake up slightly peeved at Jay-Z...but I can't say that I blame him for not wanting to take the stage with me.